Things I never thought I'd say

Before I was a mom, the things I said were normal, intelligent phrases--at least I think they were. But now, as the mother of a two year old, I hear the strangest phrases fall out of my mouth. Perhaps the strangest phenomenon of all is that, in context, these bizarre words make sense. In talking it over with friends, I am relieved to discover I'm not the only one. If you would like to share some of the things you never thought you'd say, whether as a parent, or in some other line of work, please feel free to comment away. Today's nugget: "Giraffes do not go in the microwave."